mytwothousandnine

So I went on my first date arranged through eHarmony last week.  For the sake of clarity, let’s call him Date #1.

I thought my expectations were reasonably low, but considering that he wanted to meet at a gourmet milk bar, I might have to reconsider my standards. 

Call me crazy, but I don’t think it’s too much to ask for someone to pick a place that specializes in something other than organic milk.  MILK!  And at the very least, he could have picked a place that had chairs.

I’m serious. 

There wasn’t a single chair in sight!  I couldn’t even take off my coat because there wouldn’t have been any place to put it.  And to make matters even worse, halfway through the conversation – which was truly unremarkable, by the way – a girl with braces knocked over a beer and it only narrowly missed my date’s cookie (yes, cookie).  If I wasn’t so floored by the fact that I got conned into standing in a bakery for an hour, I would have asked her where the heck she got that drink because I suddenly needed a big one.

In any case, the whole thing made me reassess what I hope to get out of eHarmony.  I’ve since decided that best case scenario, I’ll meet some real winners and consider the $112 I shelled out in membership fees an investment in making my life even more comical.  Worst case scenario – I wasted the money that my mother gave me for my birthday last year.

Either way, it doesn’t look good.   Especially when Date #1 asked me to go to a noodle bar next week.

NOODLES!

At this rate, we should be enjoying an actual meal by 2019.