mytwothousandnine

A friend recently said to me, “Your interests appear to be fitness, mousetraps and dating.  Who knew?”

And that assessment is frighteningly accurate.

It’s 2009 and I’ve decided to set some goals.  For starters, I want to have a better body at 27 than I did at 26.  If possible, I’d like to complete the same 10-mile run I did last year, but I’d like to do it 10 minutes faster and not want to throw up at the end. 

I also want to launch a line of hand-painted mousetraps.  Seriously.  I’ve lived in dozens of apartments over the years and I’m hard-pressed to think of any that didn’t have a mouse problem.  I’ve decided that I could tolerate the mice a lot better if the traps were cute and in some way contributed to the decor of my apartment.  Other people agree with me, namely a woman in Texas who just purchased the Pretty In Pink line on the Internet.

Finally, this blog is about my mishaps in online dating.  Confession time: I joined eHarmony.  My reasons are my own, but I’ll admit this much: when I originally signed up, I was serious about it.  And after one horrific experience at an organic milk bar downtown and countless mismatches provided by eHarmony’s algorithm, I’ve amended my position and decided to treat the site as a daily reminder of why I’m single – and probably better off that way.

It’s only been one month but I’ve already injured my knee, knocked a can of spray paint off my balcony and written a match on eHarmony to tell him that it looks like he has a giant snot hanging from his nose in his profile picture.

In other words, it’s been a real shit show.  And it’s bound to get worse before it gets better.

Enjoy.

Contact: nova@drexel.edu